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Saturday, July 10, 2010

Find Balance? Or Surrender?

I leave for Guatemala tonight.

I'm headed there on a mission trip for nine days with my youth group and my dad.

I'm a control freak. Not a serious control freak, but just enough of a control freak that it's noticeable. That may be the reason that heading on a plane to Central America is freaking me out. I've been to Central America before (on a vacation to visit my relatives in Panama). But the situation was different. I was mentally prepared. It was a vacation, for Heaven's sake! It didn't need much preparation.

But this is not a vacation. This is very different. This is more akin to a spiritual cocoon. The outside world (and by that I mean the world in which I live and thrive - friends, family, Seattle, etc.) is getting shut and I'm going to be living in something very different. A little village in the middle of a Central American country is something I have yet to experience. A high-rise in Panama City is the closest I've been to Guatemala.


Now all of this might read like a lack of excitement. That's incorrect. I'm very excited. I'm just off-balance. I don't like to be off-balance. I'm one of those people who will fight tooth and nail to be on balance again. Try as I might, though, I can't find the balance right now.
So maybe that's a good thing. Maybe off-balance is the way I need to be to prepare for this trip. Maybe if I'm off-balance, things will happen that would not have happened to a Michael who was calm, cool, and in control.

I guess what this means is that significance is coming my way. I just erased almost every expectation for this trip. I have no expectations for this trip, save one:

I'm pretty sure a whole heaping ton of coffee grounds are getting dumped in that
spiritual mug of mine.
May your coffee be strong, your passions electric, and your laughter easy.

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P.S. If you read daily (which I doubt there are that many of you) I wouldn't check for posts for about ten days or so. I won't be blogging in Guatemala.

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